The word of the day is 'legs'. Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
I would kick your ass right now, but that would be animal abuse.
You inspire me to be a better pervert.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Lifes a bitch....so when life sucks just sit back and enjoy the head.
I'm a very nice person...but for you I'll make an exception.
Kim Jong Il's last words. "Hey, you're Chuck Nor....."
Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.
I love walking in the rain 'cause no one can see me crying.
The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.
Until a man finds something to die for, he has nothing to live for.
If you watch Cinderella backwards, it's about a woman who learns her place.
I'm invisible, can you see me? Yeah? How about tomorrow night?
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
Nice shoes! Wanna screw?
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.
Teacher: "DO YOU WANT TO SPEND LUNCH IN MY CLASS?!" Me: Are you asking me out? O_O
