2013: The year when the movie 2012 will be moved from the action section, to comedy section.
I don't have an attitude, I have a personality you can't handle.
My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
Bombing for peace is like fucking for virginity.
What you call dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.
Brushing your teeth before breakfast, is the same as wiping your ass before taking a shit.
Mephobia. The fear of becoming so awesome that everyone dies.
Single doesn't always mean lonely and Relationship doesn't always mean happy.
You know you're getting old when people start telling you how young you look.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
Ohh, that sounds kinda harsh. I better add a 'lol'.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
Love is calling back regardless of how many times they hangup on you.
If you find yourself using the expression "haters gonna hate" a lot, there's a better than average chance you're a douchebag.
The human heart is like a spring, to bounce back from pitfalls and rise to joys, and it definitely needs space.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
How the hell does Freddy Kruger wipe his ass?
We're all born screaming, naked, and starving...then it's pretty much downhill from there.
Charlie Sheen just set record for 'fastest time to reach a million Twitter followers.' Not his only speed record.
