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2013: The year when the movie 2012 will be moved from the action section, to comedy section.

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Its much easier to apologize then it is to get permission.

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The awkward moment when somebody asks you what's wrong and they're the problem.

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Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

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Procrastination is like masturbation....you're only screwing yourself.

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It isn't till you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.

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Never close a door that someone still holds a key to.

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When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.

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Love is just a word, until someone comes along and gives it meaning.

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Behind every girls favorite song, is an untold story.

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Jingle bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away, Bella died, Jacob cried, POTTER ALL THE WAY!!

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Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I most need it.

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Research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use condom, these people are called DADS.

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A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

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Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.

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That awkward moment when it's not okay after an apology.

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I know I have friends and I know I have enemies. I just can't tell who is who.

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I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

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A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.