I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help, So I hired a hitman.
Cool story bro. Yeah your mums in the next chapter.
When your mum decides to be in the room while you're on the computer so you just switch to Google and just stare at it.
You live and you learn.
If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.
Face your problems, don't facebook them.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
I eat problems, then shit out success.
You can spend your life avoiding your dreams, but everynight you go to sleep.
Sleep, hugs, kisses, love, friends, family, memories, smiles, laughter, fun... the best things in life are free.
The last thing I want to do is die.
Bought a CD of ice cream van music. Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
If your life is so shitty maybe you should wipe your ass better.
A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.
History always has a way of repeating itself, bad or good, a perfect circle.
Don't trip over bitches, walk over them.
I've gone bankrupt a few times and it's pretty scary. But eventually I make it to the ATM and get more money.
