WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.
Depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of being too strong for too long.
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
I'm a very nice person...but for you I'll make an exception.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem.
That awkward moment when you walk through the metal detectors at the airport, and your abs of steel set them off.
I don't make the same mistake twice....I make it 5 or 6 times just to make sure.
Next time someone says "sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" I'm gonna throw the dictionary at them.
Most people are still alive because its illegal to shoot them.
Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.
Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.
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The awkward moment when somebody asks you what's wrong and they're the problem.
When I watch MTV Cribs, the feeling of guilt from illegally downloading songs goes away.
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.
The people who know the least about you, always have the most to say.
You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.
I am not good at giving advice, but can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
