I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
I will love you until the end. If you feel that I don't love you, this is just the beginning.
Don't make time for people who can't make time for you.
Homework: Do me do me. Internet: Don't listen to that slut.
If most people said what was on their minds, they'd be speechless.
Roses are red. Violets are blue! Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't be mad I'll be there too, not in the cage, but laughing at you.
I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.
Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.
I don't have an attitude, I have a personality you can't handle.
Everybody spread positivity.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
It's hard to talk face to face, when your head is up your ass.
Your actions are speaking so loudly, I cannot hear what you are saying.
Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
If I don't answer your first call, calling me 39971629829202 times won't make me pick up.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
Today was a beautiful day. Then you showed up.
