You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.
Once upon a time, there was a boy and girl who loved each other. Then a slut came and ruined everything. The end.
If you're good at something, don't do it for free.
Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
It's hard to talk face to face, when your head is up your ass.
Cool story bro, changed my life.
I will still love you when you're no longer young and beautiful.
Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have Internet connection.
You can't define love, but love can define you.
I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
A successful man is one that can make more than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
Love needs to get glasses.
The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.
