Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?
NO MUM. You're mad because you're wrong not because I was talking back.
Make money, don't let it make you.
I didn't fall, I just caught the floor.
If I got a nickel every time I told my wife I loved her....I'd have a nickel.
Love me always, love me never, but don't love me sometimes.
KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH, and you're middle finger HIGHER.
Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.
I go to bed late every night and I realize it was bad idea every morning.
I want a person who comes into my life by accident, but stays on purpose.
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
I'm killing time, waiting for time to kill me.
Man: created by God, destroyed by a women.
Believe in yourself. If you don't, then no one else will have a reason to.
Why is a school zone 20mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
Shit happens bro. Now get over it.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
