I love using big words to sound smart. I mean utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence.
Baby, I treat you like my homework, I'll slam you on the table and do you all night long.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
If she talks to you about everyone then she must talk to everyone about you.
That awkward moment when you don't die on Dec 21 and your kid asks you why he was born on Sept 21.
Don't make time for people who can't make time for you.
The people who know the least about you, always have the most to say.
He who laughs last didn't get it.
Last night I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow...when I woke up my pillow was gone.
Negativity is poison for the soul.
Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
If all MEN are the same, why do WOMEN take so long to choose one?
Some take the bait, others reel it in.
Sex is like money. It's only a problem when you don't have any.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
Karma's a bitch when you're a bitch.
I need a six month holiday, twice a year.
You can be worthless to someone, but priceless to another.