I love using big words to sound smart. I mean utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence.
Would you like a table? ... "No, I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, a carpet for 5 please." -_-
.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
Auto-correct can kiss my ask.
KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH, and you're middle finger HIGHER.
My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
It's not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Don't let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game.
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