Don't hate me because I'm better than you, hate yourself because you're not as good as me.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
The awkward moment when the world doesn't end on December 21st 2012, and a lot of girls end up being pregnant.
No really officer, I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
Bought a CD of ice cream van music. Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
You are the result of 4 billion years of evolutionary success. Fucking act like it.
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
I will love you until the end. If you feel that I don't love you, this is just the beginning.
Last night I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow...when I woke up my pillow was gone.
Love always costs more than you can afford, but its always worth the price.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot.
Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright, its not the end.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
I love you more than a fat kid loves cake.
A rumor goes in one ear, then out of many mouths.
Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.
