Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left then turn to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
Your character is more accurately determined by what you say about others behind their backs.
Today I went on thesaurus.com and searched "ninjas". The computer told me "Ninjas cannot be found". Well played, ninjas, well played.
Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.
If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
What's the most successful pickup line ever? A: 'Does this smell like chloroform?'
When I watch MTV Cribs, the feeling of guilt from illegally downloading songs goes away.
Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them a second bullet for their gun because they missed the first time.
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
Born to be different, like everyone else.
The world needs less people that judge and more people that love.
I want to go to Heaven for the climate, and Hell for the company.
Haters hate because they are what you ain't.
Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
Learn to spell, kids. Auto Correct isn't always write.
