Eventually people will realize that mistakes are meant for learning not repeating.
Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
The awkward moment when you're about to hug somebody sexy and then headbutt the mirror....
You can hold on to a person but not a relationship.
Short answers silent treatment not smiling = You did something wrong.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
I'm not an alchoholic, I'm a drunk. Alchoholics go to meetings.
Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.
It's weird not to be weird.
Take my advice, don't listen to my advice.
To catch me, you gotta be fast. To find me, you gotta be smart. To be me? Sh*t! You gotta be kidding!
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
When single you see happy couples. When in a relationship you see happy singles.
My ideal mate is someone like you, but with a different personality and with a different face.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.
