Eventually people will realize that mistakes are meant for learning not repeating.
.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I
You live and you learn.
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
Whenever I use "Thus" in a essay, I feel like motherfucking Shakespeare.
The lottery: voluntary taxation.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
I have a lot of time on my hands when I'm wearing two watches.
Your a boy, I'm a girl. So tell me again why we aren't dating?
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.
Always remember to smile.
The awkward moment when wikipedia has copied your homework.
A relationship with NO TRUST is like a car with no gasoline. You can stay in it all you want but it won't go anywhere.
Don't punish the man in front of you for the mistakes made by the man behind you.
Thanks wind, you totally raped my hair.
It's better to be the owner of your silence than the slave of your words.
What's the most successful pickup line ever? A: 'Does this smell like chloroform?'
Those awkward karate chops you give door just incase it shocks you.
