Yeah, I'm single, but you're gonna have to be amazing to change that.
You can hold on to a person but not a relationship.
I know I just met you last week but I kinda, sorta, just maybe, seriously have been curiously thinking about you every day since.
You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
You do not learn anything by doing everything right.
You look at them. They look at you. You look away. Awkward.
Unicorns are awesome. I am awesome. Therefore, I am a unicorn.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants.
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
If I got a nickel every time I told my wife I loved her....I'd have a nickel.
I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it.
Playing comes first, you can work later.
You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
Fight poverty. Throw stones at beggers.
Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I wanted a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
