Yeah, I'm single, but you're gonna have to be amazing to change that.
You need over 60 muscles to look angry and less then 10 to smile, so why tire yourself?
Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too, bitch.
Here's a condom so that you can have protection while you go fuck yourself. :)
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
If you aren't good at lying, you better be good at keeping secrets.
I'll advise you... don't mess with me: I know Karate, Judo, Tai Kwon Do, Jujitsu and 28 other dangerous words.
Take it easy, give it hard.
Women don't want to hear what you think, women want to hear what they think, in a deeper voice.
When your best friend comes to you with a bitch problem and you're like"I don't give a fuck."
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
If you were a transformer you would be a hot-obot called Optimus Fine.
Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.
My brain: 5% names, 3% phone numbers, 2% stuff I should know for school, 90% song lyrics.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
Maturity is knowing when to be immature.
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.
If they dont chase you when you walk away....keep walking.
