You never how much is enough until you know how much is too much.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
I am not good at giving advice, but can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.
Jesus can walk on water. Ice is 100% water, I can walk on ice. Therefore, I'M 100% JESUS BITCHES.
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
The awkward moment when you're on a bouncy castle and you fall down and the other bitches on there wont stop jumping so u can't get back up.
Research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use condom, these people are called DADS.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
It's weird not to be weird.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Shit happens bro. Now get over it.
It sucks that you can't photoshop that personality too, bitch.
If you were my homework I'd do you on the table.
Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them a second bullet for their gun because they missed the first time.
Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
If I don't answer your first call, calling me 39971629829202 times won't make me pick up.
Nice shoes! Wanna screw?
