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Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?

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Women worry about the things that men forget. Men worry about the things that women remember.

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The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.

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Don't waste electricity, would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?

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I will love you until the end. If you feel that I don't love you, this is just the beginning.

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Treat every problem as your dog would: If you can't eat it, fuck it or piss on it, then walk away.

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Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.

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Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.

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I can only endure saying goodbye because saying hello again will be all the sweeter.

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Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.

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When life throws a rock at you, throw back a brick.

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A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

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Your actions are speaking so loudly, I cannot hear what you are saying.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.

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Life is not measured by the amount of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

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A girl just told me she wants something with a lot of diamonds for her birthday, I'm gettin her a deck of cards!

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It's weird not to be weird.

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Admit it! At one point in your life you closed the fridge really slowly to see when the light turns off.