I tried to send you the most sexy thing on the planet, but the mail man told me to get out of the mailbox.
To whom much is expected, much should be suspected.
I eat problems, then shit out success.
I will still love you when you're no longer young and beautiful.
Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
If your not going to win the argument, lie.
It's hard to answer "what's wrong", when nothing is right...
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?
I hate when I'm tired and sleepy, but when I go to bed my body says "Just kidding."
The awkward moment when you politely decline food at a friends house and immediately regret the decision afterwards.
The awkward moment when someone is yelling at you and you're desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
May the bridges I burn today, light the path tomorrow.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
It's hard to talk face to face, when your head is up your ass.
Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.