Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright, its not the end.
Don't judge a book by its movie.
When your mum decides to be in the room while you're on the computer so you just switch to Google and just stare at it.
If you watch Jaws backwards, its about a shark who throws up so many people, they have to open a beach.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
You are not a winner, just the last loser standing.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.
I know I have friends and I know I have enemies. I just can't tell who is who.
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
The awkward moment when wikipedia has copied your homework.
Chuck Norris puts the "fun" in "Funeral".
You don't like my opinion, wait until you hear the ones I keep to myself.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
I always take life with a grain of salt, ...plus a slice of lemon, ...and a shot of tequila.
Treat every problem as your dog would: If you can't eat it, fuck it or piss on it, then walk away.
Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.
If it put a smile on my face, there is no reason to regret.
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