Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright, its not the end.
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
Some people should be high-fived...in the face.
You cannot fathom the amount of fuck I do not give.
Karma's a bitch when you're a bitch.
Don't hate me because I'm better than you, hate yourself because you're not as good as me.
Face your problems, don't facebook them.
Wherever you go, there you are.
Live everyday like it's your last because someday you will be right.
I can only endure saying goodbye because saying hello again will be all the sweeter.
That awkward moment when sluts wear clothes.
Homework: Do me do me. Internet: Don't listen to that slut.
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.
Did you just slap my ass? NO!? Damn I was hoping you did.
Why don't you just swallow all that makeup you put on? You might become pretty on the inside.
If you're good at something, don't do it for free.
There are two kinds of secrets: one is not worth keeping and the other is too good to keep.
Brushing your teeth before breakfast, is the same as wiping your ass before taking a shit.
I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it.
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