Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright, its not the end.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Man: created by God, destroyed by a women.
Life is like a penis, when it gets hard, fuck it.
Good things don't always have to come to an end.
I'm not flirting, I'm just acting extra nice to someone who is extra attractive.
Dear 'K', You should get arrested for killing conversations.
Winners do what other people won't.
I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.
Cool story bro, now go make me a sandwich.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
Fight poverty. Throw stones at beggers.
I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.
Immaturity keeps me young.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
I didn't lose my sanity. I sent it away for its own protection.
Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.
That moment when your mum shouts your name so you do a quick recap of all the things you've done recently to see if you're in trouble.