I go to bed late every night and I realize it was bad idea every morning.
Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
Every day you will meet a moron; if you haven't met one today, tomorrow you'll meet two.
Haters hate because they are what you ain't.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
If we're not supposed to have late night snacks....why is there a light in the fridge?
Next time someone says "sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" I'm gonna throw the dictionary at them.
Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
When someone says "It's getting hot in here" I automatically think, "So take off all your clothes".
Cry over cuts and stitches not bastards and bitches.
You have ONE advantage over me, you can kiss my ass and I can't.
Don't allow someone to be your priorty while allowing yourself to be there option.
I'm a bitch? You're a bitch. Your mom's a bitch for having a bitch, your dad's a bitch for fucking a bitch. Now who's the bitch, bitch?
Laughter is a better way to bring tears to the eyes.
Say what you mean and mean what you say because the people that matter don't mind and the people that mind don't matter.
Most people are still alive because its illegal to shoot them.
If your not going to win the argument, lie.
Light up the world with your smile, because you never know who might be stuck somewhere dark.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.