I bet Osama Bin Laden regrets coming out of hiding to watch the Royal Wedding.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
When someone says "It's getting hot in here" I automatically think, "So take off all your clothes".
A soulmate is meeting the piece of you that is missing. It's undeniable and scary, but you feel lost without it.
Sometimes I look at people and think: That sperm actually won?
I don't know what's worse. Guys who refer to girls as b*tches, or the girls who actually respond to it.
Negativity is poison for the soul.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.
If we're not supposed to have late night snacks....why is there a light in the fridge?
Everybody spread positivity.
If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer...oh wait, he does.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
Don't make time for people who can't make time for you.
Single doesn't always mean lonely and Relationship doesn't always mean happy.
The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.
