I bet Osama Bin Laden regrets coming out of hiding to watch the Royal Wedding.
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
Right things happen at the wrong time if you wait for them to happen.
Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
I love you more than a fat kid loves cake.
My brain: 5% names, 3% phone numbers, 2% stuff I should know for school, 90% song lyrics.
He broke her heart. She broke his X-Box. I think we all know who cried harder.
If karma doesn't knock you out soon, I will.
I'm not single. I'm in a long-standing relationship with fun and freedom.
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.
I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.
I'm sorry you had bad luck and turned out to be an idiot.
Man: created by God, destroyed by a women.
If she talks to you about everyone then she must talk to everyone about you.
2013: The year when the movie 2012 will be moved from the action section, to comedy section.
May the bridges I burn today, light the path tomorrow.
When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
