If you watch Cinderella backwards, it's about a woman who learns her place.
It takes more energy to look back than to look forward into the future.
When you're sober you think twice before you speak but when you're drunk you speak twice before you think.
The awkward moment when you're on a bouncy castle and you fall down and the other bitches on there wont stop jumping so u can't get back up.
He who laughs last didn't get it.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
Believe in yourself. If you don't, then no one else will have a reason to.
That awkward moment when sluts wear clothes.
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
How ironic is life. We spend so much money on expensive clothes, but the best moments in life are spent without clothes
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
Some take the bait, others reel it in.
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.
It isn't till you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.
Cool story bro, changed my life.
I don't hate school. I just hate the teachers, the homework, the exams and waking up early in the morning.