Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
The ultimate price you pay is nothing but time.
There's no such thing as good girls gone bad, only bad girls found out.
If it put a smile on my face, there is no reason to regret.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
Disappointments are just God's way of saying: "I've got something better." Be patient, live life, have faith.
How much coke did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.
You look at them. They look at you. You look away. Awkward.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of bill payments.
He broke her heart. She broke his X-Box. I think we all know who cried harder.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
Love needs to get glasses.
Procrastination is like masturbation....you're only screwing yourself.
Until a man finds something to die for, he has nothing to live for.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
You never how much is enough until you know how much is too much.