I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
You are not a winner, just the last loser standing.
My wife says that I don't listen to her, or something like that.
I want to go to Heaven for the climate, and Hell for the company.
Born to be different, like everyone else.
Ran into my ex last week... backed up and ran over his ass again.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.
If you aren't good at lying, you better be good at keeping secrets.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Wherever you go, there you are.
It sucks that you can't photoshop that personality too, bitch.
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
You can't define love, but love can define you.
You do not learn anything by doing everything right.
Never frown, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Teacher: "DO YOU WANT TO SPEND LUNCH IN MY CLASS?!" Me: Are you asking me out? O_O
