I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
Everyone and everything eventually becomes only just a memory.
Would you like a table? ... "No, I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, a carpet for 5 please." -_-
My wife says that I don't listen to her, or something like that.
From a girl's point of view, the guy always chooses the slut. From a boy's point of view, the girl always chooses the jerk.
If I'm weird with you, I'm comfortable with you.
What's the most successful pickup line ever? A: 'Does this smell like chloroform?'
If you were my homework I'd do you on the table.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
I'm gonna go take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.
I'm not a nerd, I'm just smarter then you.
That awkward moment when your in class then your stomach decides to make this dying whale's voice.
Sleep, hugs, kisses, love, friends, family, memories, smiles, laughter, fun... the best things in life are free.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
Take it easy, give it hard.
Today was a beautiful day. Then you showed up.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
I've gone bankrupt a few times and it's pretty scary. But eventually I make it to the ATM and get more money.
