I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
Love me always, love me never, but don't love me sometimes.
Off; the general direction in which I wish you would fuck.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, 'In Jesus name, amen'
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
I didn't lose my sanity. I sent it away for its own protection.
I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
Never lie to someone who trusts you. Never trust someone who lies to you.
Unicorns are awesome. I am awesome. Therefore, I am a unicorn.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
Never count on tomorrow because it may forget to show up.
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
Life is a case of spoon or be spooned.
Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.
Homework: Do me do me. Internet: Don't listen to that slut.
I know they say the first love is the sweetest, but that first cut is the deepest.
