It's weird not to be weird.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
Chuck Norris once strangled someone with a cordless phone.
The last thing I want to do is die.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
You don't like my opinion, wait until you hear the ones I keep to myself.
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them.
Cool story bro. In what chapter do you shut the fuck up in?
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.
I will still love you when you're no longer young and beautiful.
So you're the bitch that told the bitch that I'm a bitch well listen bitch it takes a bitch to know a bitch, bitch.
The awkward moment when you're about to hug somebody sexy and then headbutt the mirror....
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem.
Shit happens bro. Now get over it.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
