You can't buy love....but you pay heavily for it.
I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
Sex is like money. It's only a problem when you don't have any.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
The awkward moment when you're about to hug somebody sexy and then headbutt the mirror....
I'm gonna go take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.
Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.
Disappointments are just God's way of saying: "I've got something better." Be patient, live life, have faith.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
When life puts you in tough situations don't say "WHY ME?", just say "TRY ME".
It isn't till you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
You're only as good as your last game.
Just because your smart doesn't mean your wise.
How ironic is life. We spend so much money on expensive clothes, but the best moments in life are spent without clothes
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.
