Man: created by God, destroyed by a women.
Laughing is when a smile has an orgasm.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
To catch me, you gotta be fast. To find me, you gotta be smart. To be me? Sh*t! You gotta be kidding!
Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.
You are not a winner, just the last loser standing.
If you find yourself using the expression "haters gonna hate" a lot, there's a better than average chance you're a douchebag.
How the hell does Freddy Kruger wipe his ass?
I'm not giving you an hour, or a second, or another minute longer. I'm busy getting stronger.
Shit happens bro. Now get over it.
How much coke did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.
"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
You're only as good as your last game.
If your life is so shitty maybe you should wipe your ass better.
Be positive for no reason.
Dear 'K', You should get arrested for killing conversations.
Laughter is a better way to bring tears to the eyes.
Don't punish the man in front of you for the mistakes made by the man behind you.