Truth can stand on its own, only lies require faith.
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I'd take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
If your life is so shitty maybe you should wipe your ass better.
If you can't be a good example then at least be a horrible warning.
Dreams lift when reality falls.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
Teacher: Why can I hear talking? Student: Because you have ears.
I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
Testing boys by not responding to their txts to see if they'll txt you again.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
Don't wait for anybody to complete you.
Sex is like money. It's only a problem when you don't have any.
Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.
Learn to spell, kids. Auto Correct isn't always write.
I know I just met you last week but I kinda, sorta, just maybe, seriously have been curiously thinking about you every day since.
Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.
I'm not an Alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, I already have one.
Nice guys finish last, that is because they put their girls first.
