You're only as good as your last game.
Would you like a table? ... "No, I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, a carpet for 5 please." -_-
You do not learn anything by doing everything right.
You have ONE advantage over me, you can kiss my ass and I can't.
Next time someone says "sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" I'm gonna throw the dictionary at them.
Disappointments are just God's way of saying: "I've got something better." Be patient, live life, have faith.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
The awkward moment when you realize that people are really laughing at you, not with you.
I'm not an Alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, I already have one.
I have a lot of time on my hands when I'm wearing two watches.
Always remember to smile.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
Sitting in the cinema, ready to watch the movie, then BOOM! The human giraffe sits in front of you.
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she's not your friend anymore.
Your character is more accurately determined by what you say about others behind their backs.
