Say what you mean and mean what you say because the people that matter don't mind and the people that mind don't matter.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.
I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Whatever floats your boat as long, as it doesn't sink mine.
Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
That moment when your mum shouts your name so you do a quick recap of all the things you've done recently to see if you're in trouble.
When your mum decides to be in the room while you're on the computer so you just switch to Google and just stare at it.
I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
History always has a way of repeating itself, bad or good, a perfect circle.
I would kick your ass right now, but that would be animal abuse.
Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them a second bullet for their gun because they missed the first time.
Teacher: "You failed the test." - Student:"You failed to educate."
You inspire me to be a better pervert.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
It's half water, and half air. So really, the glass is never half empty.
Don't trip over bitches, walk over them.