If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
Laughing at the person because the joke was a fail.
Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
I'm experiencing Deja Vu and Amnesia at the same time... I think I've forgotten this before...
I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.
If we only attempt that which we are capable of doing, we will never grow.
Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
When I'm bored, I eat. When I'm happy, I eat. When I'm sad, I eat.
I don't have an attitude, I have a personality you can't handle.
Everyone keeps telling me how fun Angry Birds is, but I've been insulting my parakeet all week and he just seems hurt.
It's weird not to be weird.
A successful man is one that can make more than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I
You know you love her when people think you're crazy.
The greatest part of being imperfect, is being perfect at it.
Accept what you can't change and change what you can't accept.
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