If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, 'In Jesus name, amen'
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
If your life is so shitty maybe you should wipe your ass better.
You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.
The word of the day is 'legs'. Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
If I got a nickel every time I told my wife I loved her....I'd have a nickel.
Playing comes first, you can work later.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
I'm killing time, waiting for time to kill me.
It isn't till you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.
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