Laughing is when a smile has an orgasm.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
Some women can't find a GOOD MAN cause they're too busy looking for a PERFECT MAN.
Cry over cuts and stitches not bastards and bitches.
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.
Sex burns 25.7 calories per minute, with that being said, wanna work out?
Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.
Cool story bro. Publish it and sell it to someone who gives a shit.
When staring someone in the eyes, u wait for them to stare back at you.
New anti depressant for lesbians... Trycoxagain
Life's not a bitch, you're the bitch because your not trying hard enough.
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
If you can't be a good example then at least be a horrible warning.
Today I went on thesaurus.com and searched "ninjas". The computer told me "Ninjas cannot be found". Well played, ninjas, well played.
Whenever I use "Thus" in a essay, I feel like motherfucking Shakespeare.
It's weird not to be weird.
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.
