I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.
Teacher: Why can I hear talking? Student: Because you have ears.
The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.
If we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket...I'd miss u heaps and think of you often.
A real man gives up one night stands for a woman he can't stand one night without.
I'm sorry you had bad luck and turned out to be an idiot.
The more pictures you post of your pet the more lonely you are. It's science.
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
Winners do what other people won't.
You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.
I have a lot of time on my hands when I'm wearing two watches.
Cool story bro. Yeah your mums in the next chapter.
The human heart is like a spring, to bounce back from pitfalls and rise to joys, and it definitely needs space.
Laughter is a better way to bring tears to the eyes.
I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.
Some people should be high-fived...in the face.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
Born to be different, like everyone else.
Take it easy, give it hard.
