I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer...oh wait, he does.
I'm so broke I can't even pay attention.
Haters make you famous.
I hate when I'm on the couch after a long day, I put the TV on and then my family starts having a competition of who can be the loudest.
I'm thinking of a finger, and it's not 1, 2, 4, or 5.
Perception is everything.
Thanks wind, you totally raped my hair.
Everybody is a student for life.
I went up to my moms face and screamed " I WANT FOOD !!! " Until I got slapped in the face
Teacher: Why can I hear talking? Student: Because you have ears.
I'm not spoiled, I'm just well taken care of.
You are the result of 4 billion years of evolutionary success. Fucking act like it.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
You'll never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.
I'll advise you... don't mess with me: I know Karate, Judo, Tai Kwon Do, Jujitsu and 28 other dangerous words.
