Single doesn't always mean lonely and Relationship doesn't always mean happy.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
Why is a school zone 20mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
I go to bed late every night and I realize it was bad idea every morning.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
The people who know the least about you, always have the most to say.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except marriage, marriage will kill you.
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
I'm not single. I'm in a long-standing relationship with fun and freedom.
You're only as good as your last game.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
Life is to SHORT, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
Mario: An Italian plumber that was created by Japanese people, who speaks English, but looks like a Mexican.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Brushing your teeth before breakfast, is the same as wiping your ass before taking a shit.
Mom: What do you think I am, made of money? Daughter: Isn't that what MOM stands for?
