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Cool story bro, changed my life.

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If we only attempt that which we are capable of doing, we will never grow.

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Winners don't wait for chances, they grab them.

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Women want one man to fulfill their every need. Men want every woman to fulfill their one need.

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Here's a condom so that you can have protection while you go fuck yourself. :)

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Sitting in the cinema, ready to watch the movie, then BOOM! The human giraffe sits in front of you.

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Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.

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You'll never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.

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The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.

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Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.

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I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help, So I hired a hitman.

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You need over 60 muscles to look angry and less then 10 to smile, so why tire yourself?

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Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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Trust in God but lock your car.

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Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.

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I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot.

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It takes more energy to look back than to look forward into the future.

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I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.