Cool story bro, changed my life.
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
Don't like me? Take a seat with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck
He broke her heart. She broke his X-Box. I think we all know who cried harder.
I've gone bankrupt a few times and it's pretty scary. But eventually I make it to the ATM and get more money.
Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
Make money, don't let it make you.
I'm your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.
We put the "us" in trust, baby.
Pickles are just cucumbers soaked in evil.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
Stubbing your toe and telling the inanimate object to f*ck off.
I didn't lose my sanity. I sent it away for its own protection.
Cool story bro, now go make me a sandwich.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.
