Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
WORRY looks around. REGRET looks back. FAITH looks forward.
I'm not an Alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, I already have one.
A pretty girl is nothing with an ugly attitude.
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
That awkward moment when sluts wear clothes.
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
Whatever floats your boat as long, as it doesn't sink mine.
Women want one man to fulfill their every need. Men want every woman to fulfill their one need.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
I know they say the first love is the sweetest, but that first cut is the deepest.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
Women don't want to hear what you think, women want to hear what they think, in a deeper voice.
11.24265336624% of people pay too much attention to details.
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