Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
Definition of disappointment: guy runs into a wall with a boner and breaks his nose first...
Immaturity keeps me young.
Hurting someone with the truth is better than killing them with a lie.
Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.
I'm not an Alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, I already have one.
I don't know what's worse. Guys who refer to girls as b*tches, or the girls who actually respond to it.
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.
Who you are, who you want to be, and who you once were can be three different people.
There's no such thing as good girls gone bad, only bad girls found out.
My life without you would be like a broken pencil. Pointless.
The awkward moment when somebody asks you what's wrong and they're the problem.
Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
The minute you settle for less than what you deserve you get less than what you settled for.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
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