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Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.

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Letting go doesn't mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be.

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The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.

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Have you ever noticed that when you walk into a spider web you suddenly become a ninja?

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I hate people who are lazy. They're so lazy, they don't even finish their own

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.sdrawkcab siht daer uoy edam I

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I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

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The lottery: voluntary taxation.

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If most people said what was on their minds, they'd be speechless.

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Don't tell me the rules if you can't even play the game.

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Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.

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Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.

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I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.

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I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.

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Your a boy, I'm a girl. So tell me again why we aren't dating?

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Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone.

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I couldn't help but notice that awesome ends with 'me' and ugly starts with 'u'.

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24 hours in a day 24 beers in a case coincidence? I think not.

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I'm not flirting, I'm just acting extra nice to someone who is extra attractive.