Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
That awkward moment when it's not okay after an apology.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
Me: *sneeze* Class: *silence*. Popular girl: *sneeze* Class: God bless you amazing and lovely sweetheart.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.
You don't like my opinion, wait until you hear the ones I keep to myself.
I have finally decided to give a crap. Now who wants the first piece?
My brain: 5% names, 3% phone numbers, 2% stuff I should know for school, 90% song lyrics.
If karma doesn't knock you out soon, I will.
My biggest mistake is not kissing you when I had the chance.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
Imagine how different your life would be if you said literally everything that was on your mind.
You should appreciate what you have, before it becomes what you had.
Until a man finds something to die for, he has nothing to live for.
We're all born screaming, naked, and starving...then it's pretty much downhill from there.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
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