Women worry about the things that men forget. Men worry about the things that women remember.
A pretty girl is nothing with an ugly attitude.
Admit it! At one point in your life you closed the fridge really slowly to see when the light turns off.
I really need you to, put the camera down and step away from the mirror.
Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright, its not the end.
To whom much is expected, much should be suspected.
If you want to look young and thin, hang out around fat old people.
I'm gonna go take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.
Forget it enough to get over it, remember it enough so it doesnt happen again.
I'm not stupid, I'm just not thinking straight right now.
Life is a case of spoon or be spooned.
The last thing I want to do is die.
Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
"Dude that song is old"...."Well so is your mom....but you still listen to her."
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
Every sinner has a future, every saint has a past.
Everything becomes funnier when you're not allowed to laugh.
I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.
