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Women worry about the things that men forget. Men worry about the things that women remember.

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If you can't be a good example then at least be a horrible warning.

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When I'm bored, I eat. When I'm happy, I eat. When I'm sad, I eat.

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How the hell does Freddy Kruger wipe his ass?

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I go to bed late every night and I realize it was bad idea every morning.

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Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.

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Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

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Those who live by the sword are bound to be shot by those who don't.

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Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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You can't buy love....but you pay heavily for it.

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We put the "us" in trust, baby.

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Never close a door that someone still holds a key to.

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Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you weaker and weaker until it eventually kills you.

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The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.

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Always remember to smile.

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Definition of disappointment: guy runs into a wall with a boner and breaks his nose first...

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I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.

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The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.

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Negativity is poison for the soul.