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The human heart is like a spring, to bounce back from pitfalls and rise to joys, and it definitely needs space.

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Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

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You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.

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Some people should be high-fived...in the face.

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Trust in God but lock your car.

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Eventually people will realize that mistakes are meant for learning not repeating.

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I have a lot of time on my hands when I'm wearing two watches.

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When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.

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Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

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Off; the general direction in which I wish you would fuck.

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We just have to accept the fact that some people are going to stay in our hearts....even if they don't stay in our lives.

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Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

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Fear not the weapon, but the hand that wields it.

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Make money, don't let it make you.

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I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.

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The awkward moment when you're about to hug somebody sexy and then headbutt the mirror....

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Laughing at the person because the joke was a fail.

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You never realize how offensive your music is until your parents are sitting in the passenger seat.

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If you want to look young and thin, hang out around fat old people.