I didn't fall, I just caught the floor.
A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
Love needs to get glasses.
Homework: Do me do me. Internet: Don't listen to that slut.
Hurting someone with the truth is better than killing them with a lie.
You're only as good as your last game.
I couldn't help but notice that awesome ends with 'me' and ugly starts with 'u'.
The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
I don't have enough middle fingers to show you how I feel.
Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
We are bestfriends. Always remember that when you fall, I'll pick you up. After I finish laughing.
If someone tries to bring you down it means that you are higher than them.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of bill payments.
Until a man finds something to die for, he has nothing to live for.
I miss you like an idiot misses the point.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.
I really need you to, put the camera down and step away from the mirror.
