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Wherever you go, there you are.

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Haters make you famous.

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You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.

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NO MUM. You're mad because you're wrong not because I was talking back.

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Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.

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The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.

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The minute you settle for less than what you deserve you get less than what you settled for.

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If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

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If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

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If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

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Those who live by the sword are bound to be shot by those who don't.

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I hate when I walk into a room, forget what I need, walk out and then remember.

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Cool story bro. In what chapter do you shut the fuck up in?

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Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

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Imagine how different your life would be if you said literally everything that was on your mind.

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Love is calling back regardless of how many times they hangup on you.

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You're only as good as your last game.

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I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot.