Men are like parking lots; all the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
I'm not a nerd, I'm just smarter then you.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
I want to go to Heaven for the climate, and Hell for the company.
Everyone thinks that: Its every girl's dream to find the perfect guy....in fact its every girl's dream to eat without getting fat.
Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have Internet connection.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.
I'm a very nice person...but for you I'll make an exception.
You never how much is enough until you know how much is too much.
The word of the day is 'legs'. Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
Don't hate me because I'm better than you, hate yourself because you're not as good as me.
Disappointments are just God's way of saying: "I've got something better." Be patient, live life, have faith.
Cool story bro. You should get it in Oprah's book club.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
How the hell does Freddy Kruger wipe his ass?
I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.
Everyday the sun rises, but it doesn't shine until you wake up.
