Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
When single you see happy couples. When in a relationship you see happy singles.
You cannot fathom the amount of fuck I do not give.
Today is the Tomorrow we worried about Yesterday.
My ideal mate is someone like you, but with a different personality and with a different face.
If they dont chase you when you walk away....keep walking.
Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants.
Those who live by the sword are bound to be shot by those who don't.
Not everyone's gonna understand you and that's ok.
Teacher: Why can I hear talking? Student: Because you have ears.
You do not learn anything by doing everything right.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
Facebook is for for friends who are now strangers, Twitter is for strangers who should be your friends.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Whatever floats your boat as long, as it doesn't sink mine.
Smart girls open their mind, easy girls open their legs, and foolish girls open their heart.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
NO MUM. You're mad because you're wrong not because I was talking back.
Brushing your teeth before breakfast, is the same as wiping your ass before taking a shit.
