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2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.

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When we hit our lowest point, We are open to the greatest changes.

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Love is just a word, until someone comes along and gives it meaning.

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Your a boy, I'm a girl. So tell me again why we aren't dating?

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Life is not measured by the amount of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

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We're all born screaming, naked, and starving...then it's pretty much downhill from there.

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Got an issue? Get a tissue.

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Perception is everything.

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Women don't want to hear what you think, women want to hear what they think, in a deeper voice.

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Testing boys by not responding to their txts to see if they'll txt you again.

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Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.

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Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.

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I'm not an alchoholic, I'm a drunk. Alchoholics go to meetings.

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Drunk words are sober thoughts.

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You are not a winner, just the last loser standing.

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A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.

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We are bestfriends. Always remember that when you fall, I'll pick you up. After I finish laughing.

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You can be worthless to someone, but priceless to another.

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The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.