I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
I'll advise you... don't mess with me: I know Karate, Judo, Tai Kwon Do, Jujitsu and 28 other dangerous words.
If you can't change your circumstances, change the way you respond to them.
The awkward moment when somebody asks you what's wrong and they're the problem.
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
Facebook is for for friends who are now strangers, Twitter is for strangers who should be your friends.
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
If you watch Cinderella backwards, it's about a woman who learns her place.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
We always start with completing the difficult. It just takes us a little longer to do the impossible.
If all MEN are the same, why do WOMEN take so long to choose one?
I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
