I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
Shit happens bro. Now get over it.
Last night I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow...when I woke up my pillow was gone.
Some people just need a high-five. To the face. With a chair.
Don't judge a book by its movie.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
Haters hate because they are what you ain't.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
If you text me first, it's your job to keep the conversation going!
If you got haters, you must be doing something right.
Roses are red. Violets are blue! Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't be mad I'll be there too, not in the cage, but laughing at you.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
I went up to my moms face and screamed " I WANT FOOD !!! " Until I got slapped in the face
Kim Jong Il's last words. "Hey, you're Chuck Nor....."
Laughing is when a smile has an orgasm.
Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too, bitch.
That awkward moment when sluts wear clothes.
