When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Science has made us gods even before we are worthy of being men.
You live and you learn.
Real eyes realize real lies.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
My wife says that I don't listen to her, or something like that.
There's no such thing as good girls gone bad, only bad girls found out.
If karma doesn't knock you out soon, I will.
I'm so broke I can't even pay attention.
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift. That is why they call it the present.
Take my advice, don't listen to my advice.
It's not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.
I hate when I walk into a room, forget what I need, walk out and then remember.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
So you're the bitch that told the bitch that I'm a bitch well listen bitch it takes a bitch to know a bitch, bitch.
Do you work at Subway? Cause you just gave me a footlong.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left then turn to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
