When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly.
Its the scars that can't be seen that take the longest to heal.
Playing comes first, you can work later.
I hate people who are lazy. They're so lazy, they don't even finish their own
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.
You never how much is enough until you know how much is too much.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
Hello substitute teacher... Goodbye assigned seats.
Girls are like aspirin. I take two and go to bed.
Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to, unless you're in prison.
I have moments of brilliance and hours of stupidity.
Fight poverty. Throw stones at beggers.
I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help, So I hired a hitman.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
I will stop loving you when the mute guy tells the deaf guy that the blind guy saw a legless man walk on water, yeah that means never.
Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.
