When I'm always in my room; parents complain. When I go out; parents complain.
Live everyday like it's your last because someday you will be right.
Would you like a table? ... "No, I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, a carpet for 5 please." -_-
Cool story bro, changed my life.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
Love me always, love me never, but don't love me sometimes.
Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
Science has made us gods even before we are worthy of being men.
Those awkward karate chops you give door just incase it shocks you.
A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Teacher: "You failed the test." - Student:"You failed to educate."
Letting go doesn't mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be.
I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.
The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.
Married men live longer than single men, but they're a lot more willing to die.
