If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
No one said it would be easy but I'm saying it's going to be worth it.
S_CCESS can't be complete without U.
Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
I'm not spoiled, I'm just well taken care of.
I need a six month holiday, twice a year.
The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot.
Don't like me? Take a seat with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck
I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.
That awkward moment when sluts wear clothes.
Everyone keeps telling me how fun Angry Birds is, but I've been insulting my parakeet all week and he just seems hurt.
Cockiness is just confidence without confidence.
Roses are red. Violets are blue! Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't be mad I'll be there too, not in the cage, but laughing at you.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she's not your friend anymore.
Laughter is a better way to bring tears to the eyes.
I have no time for stupid people. But they sure do have time for me.
Once upon a time, there was a boy and girl who loved each other. Then a slut came and ruined everything. The end.
