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Me: *sneeze* Class: *silence*. Popular girl: *sneeze* Class: God bless you amazing and lovely sweetheart.

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Each morning when we wake up, we have two choices: go back to sleep and keep dreaming, or wake up and chase those dreams.

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When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.

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Don't hate me because I'm better than you, hate yourself because you're not as good as me.

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It's half water, and half air. So really, the glass is never half empty.

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The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

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Admit it! At one point in your life you closed the fridge really slowly to see when the light turns off.

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When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.

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How much coke did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.

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"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.

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I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot.

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I have a lot of time on my hands when I'm wearing two watches.

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There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.

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Fall in love with my mind.

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Ladies, the only time it is okay to be skeleton skinny is when you are dead. So eat the frigging cookie and enjoy it.

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Your character is more accurately determined by what you say about others behind their backs.

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

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Everyone and everything eventually becomes only just a memory.