NO MUM. You're mad because you're wrong not because I was talking back.
If you watch Jaws backwards, its about a shark who throws up so many people, they have to open a beach.
The awkward moment when somebody asks you what's wrong and they're the problem.
I put the laughter in manslaughter.
Procrastination is like masturbation....you're only screwing yourself.
11.24265336624% of people pay too much attention to details.
Sadly some boys think of girls as books; If the cover doesn't catch their eye they don't bother to read whats inside.
It's weird not to be weird.
Mephobia. The fear of becoming so awesome that everyone dies.
You said what you said and you said what you said, so what you said is what you said.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
It's not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
Short answers silent treatment not smiling = You did something wrong.
Cool story bro. The best part is when you stopped talking.
Compromising is the same as losing, it just sucks more because winning was never in the deal.
When you're sober you think twice before you speak but when you're drunk you speak twice before you think.
