Whenever I use "Thus" in a essay, I feel like motherfucking Shakespeare.
If you can't be a good example then at least be a horrible warning.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.
I couldn't help but notice that awesome ends with 'me' and ugly starts with 'u'.
How much coke did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.
Negativity is poison for the soul.
When all fails, kamikaze and take everyone with you.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
I always wanted to be someone. I see now that I should have been more specific.
It's weird not to be weird.
The sacrifice of hiding in the light is living with your shadows.
When life blows sometimes the best thing you can be is a dick.
It takes more energy to look back than to look forward into the future.
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
Everybody is a student for life.
You don't need some one to complete you, you just need someone to accept you completely...
There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.
I'm your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.
