If your not going to win the argument, lie.
To catch me, you gotta be fast. To find me, you gotta be smart. To be me? Sh*t! You gotta be kidding!
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
Disappointments are just God's way of saying: "I've got something better." Be patient, live life, have faith.
The awkward moment when you're on a bouncy castle and you fall down and the other bitches on there wont stop jumping so u can't get back up.
Stubbing your toe and telling the inanimate object to f*ck off.
Lifes a bitch....so when life sucks just sit back and enjoy the head.
Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
Negativity is poison for the soul.
Face your problems, don't facebook them.
Whatever floats your boat as long, as it doesn't sink mine.
That awkward moment when you walk through the metal detectors at the airport, and your abs of steel set them off.
You're only as good as your last game.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
I'm not an Alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, I already have one.
Born to be different, like everyone else.
Do you work at Subway? Cause you just gave me a footlong.
Life is a case of spoon or be spooned.
